Thursday, 10 November 2016

More of This: Women Empowering Women



Whoever said “women are their own worst enemies” wasn’t lying or understating either.
Among women, there is; jealousy, envy, bitterness, unhealthy competition, gossiping, rivalry etc. We criticize one another’s style of dressing, background and lifestyle. We get in each other’s way negatively, seeking ways to bring down the next girl when we would do much better minding our business(es) and SUPPORTING or EMPOWERING one another.

Supporting your fellow woman doesn’t exactly mean calling in everyday to check up on her or remembering to write an epistle and send a cake on her birthday. It means showing compassion and empathy. It means empowering her and giving her a hand up instead of a hand out. It means teaching, dishing out knowledge and sharing what we know, no matter how mundane it seems. People can learn from our mistakes and experiences so why are we keeping them to ourselves? Also, when you teach you learn. The truth is, we can know a truckload of stuff, but we can’t possibly know everything. 

Women can learn so much from each other if we give ourselves the chance. There are so many women struggling to be successful and independent who are doing a good job at it. We need to appreciate the effort that goes into the building process.
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Life is funny, because we ought to show support to successful and unsuccessful women. It’s even harder when she is the former. It’s difficult to be happy or to show support to someone doing better than we are. 
But it doesn’t matter if she has achieved more than we have, it doesn’t matter if she has better opportunities or a fancier closet. You cannot be upset about that.
Why? Because you don’t know how many sleepless nights, blood and tears that were sacrificed. Be happy for her so you can be at peace and learn from her.
When you struggle with envy and avoid your friend because she is doing better than you, you are shooting yourself in the foot because so much knowledge and insight can be gained from being around a more successful friend.

Be sure to give compliments when due. They cost nothing but go a long way. It lets the person know they are doing a good job and empowers them to do better. They don’t have to be your friend. If you spot a lady wearing a nice dress, let her know. Envy doesn’t let some people see road. Instead of seeing the beauty in the dress they “beef” the person wearing it. It's worrisome because this behavior stems from insecurity. So if you are that sort of lady, you need to reevaluate yourself. A little compliment will instantly light up anybody's day, give it freely.

Dear women, we need to LEARN how to stand up for each other especially on social media. I see women get so cruel and bitter over some mistake another woman made. Women are always the first in the comment section bashing, slut shaming, fat shaming, skinny shaming, judging, insulting, criticizing, throwing stones etc. Jeez!!!
If you can’t defend and stick up for a woman being thrown under the bus figuratively, walk away. Don’t make things worse with your words. Don’t do it. 

Women, Stone, Monument, Woman, Sculpture, Architecture

Compassion will make you realize that leaving nasty comments makes things worse for the victim. Empathy will let you put yourself in her shoes.Women are quick to assume the saintly role when another woman sins. We are quick to assume we are above certain situations and mistakes but it could be us, it could happen to anyone of us.

Finally, listening without judgment is a very important trait every refined woman should have especially if she wants to empower other women. Sometimes as females, all we need is a shoulder and ears, no mouth. I don’t always need advice, especially the unsolicited ones. Sometime I just want someone I can share my concerns with. I just want someone to listen to my problems and say ”it will be alright” I don’t need you to analyse what I have said to you and I don’t need you to repeat it to anyone else.
Just listen please.

All these things can be achieved through grace and kindness. Kindness makes everything else come naturally.Women are the stronger sex mentally and emotionally, lets leverage on that and empower each other, because for the world to take us seriously, we need to first take one another seriously.

God help us.




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