Adeola Kingsley-James: ‘Mental well-being and wellness are here to stay; the more equipped you are to navigate life, the better.’

Adeola Kingsley-James is a certified Rapid Transformational Hypnotherapist, Consultant, and Founder of OMG Global Consulting and Transformation Nation Africa. She has held executive and managerial positions in the television industry for nearly two decades, working on popular shows like Nigerian Idol, Big Brother Nigeria, The Apprentice Africa, EbonyLife TV, and more.

Adeola Kinsley-James is also a Best-Selling Author and Global Speaker, committed to equipping and promoting the well-being and happiness of individuals through rapid transformational strategies. Her ultimate life goal is to transform billions of lives worldwide through the power of Community, Connection, and Content.

In our conversation with her, Adeola explains the importance of therapy and shares essential tips on how to navigate step-parenting and life in general. Read & be Inspired!

With a distinguished career spanning over 17 years in the television industry, you have earned the moniker of Kingmaker. We are keen to learn about your background and how you became passionate about mental health, particularly in childhood trauma and step-parenting.
I was born in the television industry. My parents, Tunde and Bimbo Oloyede, have been TV legends in Nigeria for over 40 years, and that’s how I found my passion for the media. Having worked in that space for nearly two decades, I never believed I would do anything else. When I got married ( I got married to a widower with two kids), however, my true existence was questioned as a stepmother. I was stretched with every fibre of my being. I did not know who I was as a person anymore. I did not feel like I fit in; I lost my confidence, self-worth and esteem – I lost myself totally.

I decided to get help because I knew I was made for more in life and would not go down without a fight. So I took the bull by its horn and sought help from local and international therapists. I met a lady at a conference in America who had a peace that was so comforting that I longed for it deeply. I contacted her privately and asked if she had a community I could be a part of. She laughed and said she did not have one but mentioned that she was a Rapid Transformational Therapist. I asked her what it entailed, and she obliged and mentioned hypnotherapy, amongst other things. I laughed and declined; I thought hypnotherapy was demonic. After a few days of thinking about her and the worst that could happen, I decided to try, so I called her, we aligned, and I went through with the therapy.

My life changed after, and I was so thrilled. One day, I was sitting alone, and the thought of helping others, especially stepmoms who could be facing the same challenge, crossed my mind. So I decided to train as an RTT practitioner. I got certified and have yet to look back since then.

Was that how you started OMG Global Consulting? Can you tell me more about the courses and services you offer?
I birthed Owning My Greatness LTD for blended families to help stepmoms navigate their journey, for I know they can not do it alone. I put on my creation hat and went to town. I have written two books, STEP OUT, STEP MOM, and DEAR STEPMOM. I have courses for women “WOMAN, EVOLVE AND THRIVE. I also have courses for everyone, “BE HEARD” and “THINK IT, BELIEVE IT, BECOME IT”.

I serve clients through memberships, mentorships, one-on-one sessions, and groups. Every day, all I ask myself is how to reach out and serve more people. I have a mandate to raise 10 billion wholesome, healthy, joyful, wealthy people all over the world who are living a life of meaning and purpose, starting with one person at a time. Enough of functioning traumatic people walking on this earth when they can live life significantly. Mental well-being and wellness are here to stay; the more equipped you are to navigate life, the better.

As a rapid transformational therapist, you encounter various mental health issues in your practice. Could you shed light on these issues, how you assess each client’s needs, and your approach to addressing them?
Every client is different. I’ve dealt with various issues – anxiety, self-esteem, physical ailments, depression, insecurities, autoimmune diseases, weight loss, eyesight issues, pregnancy, conception, and relationship challenges. The list is endless. People do not know we can create physical ailments with emotional pain or trauma.

As children, we sometimes have disempowering stories from which we do not heal. We carry this hurt to adulthood and bleed on those who did not cut us; for hurt people, hurt people. With hypnotherapy, we go to the root, cause and reason why those challenges show up and deal with it by empowering that young child.

Every client of mine becomes a renewed version of themselves. They start to do things they never believed they would do. They are all amazed after their sessions with me and very grateful too. A common thread that cuts through is that people do not feel worthy enough of certain things. They either did not get enough love as a child or overgot it, which messed them up too.

Dealing with clients who are hesitant about therapy due to spiritual or religious beliefs can be challenging. How do you help such clients overcome their doubts and embrace the benefits of treatment?
I show them what the cost of not having therapy has done to them and will still do to them and their future. Then I leave them to act on it when they are ready. It is a good use of my time if they are ready, as time cannot be paid for or returned to me. So every client must be ready for therapy to be effective.

With your impressive track record of mentoring and delivering solutions to diverse clients, could you share with us a particularly challenging case you worked on and your approach to tackling it?
The most challenging part for me is encouraging people to allow me to hypnotise them. Because of what we watch on tv and hear around us, hypnotherapy is seen as demonic, satanic and controlling, just like I thought initially but it is not. So it’s a home run once I can bypass this part. ALL my clients have been grateful they worked with me and allowed me to use hypnotherapy to heal them. They have become raving clients too.

As a counselor and therapist, you constantly navigate emotionally challenging terrain that demands emotional connection and empathy. How do you prioritise self-care and maintain boundaries in this line of work?
I am never connected to the pain of any client. I only relate to their healing and see them as thus. I also energetically cover myself before working with my clients, for we are all a ball of energy that transfers to each other. Just as deep laughter can be contagious, so can our energies.

I firmly believe in teaching people how to treat me. My clients know how to treat me by how I show them how I treat myself, and they have never crossed the line with me, at least not yet. I am a master of myself also, so I always give my body what it requires. I only spend time with positive people; I’m always happy and energetic and attract the same.

As a consultant and coach, staying abreast of new developments and research in mental health is crucial. How do you ensure you remain current in your knowledge and practice?
I am a learner for life as I consistently read and study books, listen to podcasts, and attend conferences. I learn from everyone and anyone, for I listen for insights, not agreements. I have at least 100 downloaded videos on my Youtube as reference points.

Your passion for championing women is evident in your mentorship programs, conferences, and discussions about empowering women. What self-care tips can you give women who are currently juggling the responsibilities that come with their careers and the responsibilities of having a family?
Know this and know peace; no one but you is responsible for your happiness. For anyone you give it to, you also give permission to make you sad, and when this person can not make you happy, what happens? Get a village of positive people who will empower you and boost you up continuously, and stay away from people who like to compare and compete. They will destroy you. Smile as often as possible; it creates peace in your heart.

Give yourself what you need at all times. You can lie to others, but please do not lie to yourself. Take the rest, nap, sleep, and snooze when you need it, nothing will happen, and even if something does, you can deal with it when you wake up. If you are OK, everything around you will be OK too. Ask for help when you need it, then receive it graciously.

Get help from coaches, therapists, and counselors. Shout out to the rooftop if you need it. Do not be too attached to your shame than your healing; people will speak regardless. Know you can not be excellent at everything simultaneously, when you are at home with your kids, be a mom, with your husband, be a wife, at work, be a boss, at play, be a friend. Be excellent with the hats you need to wear per time and excel at it. Have a close relationship with God and master yourself excellently well.

For anyone considering entering the field of mental health counseling, what advice would you give them?
We need more hands, and this is why I created a platform called Alifeforce. ALifeForce seeks to provide discreet, professional counselling and therapy to deal with the delicate situational crises people face daily. Our services are delivered online to ensure affordability and uninterrupted accessibility to prompt professional help. Our consultants are highly trained experts with many years of experience in the field.

Everyone needs a therapist, even a therapist needs one, so please, we need more professionals who can give the support required worldwide. Please visit www.alifeforce.com if you need help. We are eager to serve and support you.

What message of encouragement would you like to share for our readers struggling with the aftermath of childhood trauma or hurt?
Seek help today. When your body is sick, who do you go and see? A doctor! When your mind is sick, who do you go and see? Same thing! A mind expert, therapist, counselor, or shrink. Seek me, and I will help you heal the childhood trauma and pain and empower you to be the best version of yourself. You will live your best life for real with no permission from anyone and no apologies. I am a living testimony of this.

If you could offer one piece of advice to teenage Adeola, what would it be?
Relax, Adeola, your life will be extremely exciting, eventful and beautiful, and you will realise that everything happening RIGHT NOW and in the future is happening for a reason and it will not end till it all works together for your good. Please sit back, hold on tight and enjoy the ride of life; it will all make sense. I will tell her to develop a deep relationship with God to make her journey more meaningful.

Connect with Adeola Kingsley James here